The Talmud on the Blessing for Mourners

b. Megillah 23b

What is the mourners’ blessing? The blessing [recited] in the square [next to the cemetery], as R. Isaac said that R. Yoḥanan said: The mourners’ blessing [is recited only] with ten [men present], and mourners [themselves] are not included in the count. The bridegrooms’ blessing [is also recited only] with ten [men present], and bridegrooms [themselves] are included in the count.

b. Ketubbot 8b

And [the Gemara raises an objection:] However, that which R. Isaac said [that] R. Yoḥanan said: One recites the blessing of the grooms in [a quorum of] ten, and the grooms are included in the tally, and one recites the blessing of the mourners in [a quorum of] ten, and the mourners are not included in the tally. Is there a blessing [recited] in the line [formed to comfort the mourners? Clearly, this statement of R. Yoḥanan cannot be explained as referring to the line]. Rather, when R. Yoḥanan said [that mourners are not included in the tally, it was] with regard to [the blessing recited] in the square [adjacent to the cemetery, where the meal of comfort takes place and various blessings are recited to comfort the mourners. Mourners are not included in the requisite quorum of ten.

The Gemara asks:] However, [with regard to] that which R. Isaac said [that] R. Yoḥanan said: One recites the blessing of the grooms in [a quorum of] ten all seven [days of celebration], and the grooms are included in the tally; and one recites the blessing of the mourners all seven [days of mourning] in [a quorum of] ten, and the mourners are not included in the tally, is there a blessing [recited] in the square all seven [days? The meal of comfort and the associated blessings take place directly after the burial, not throughout the seven days of mourning. The Gemara answers:] You find [blessings recited throughout the seven-day mourning period] in [a case where] new faces [who did not attend the burial are present. In that case, eulogies and words of comfort are repeated, and the blessing of the mourners is recited again.]

[This is] similar to that [incident] involving R. Ḥiyya bar Abba, who was the Bible teacher of the sons of Resh Lakish, and some say [that he was] the Mishnah teacher of the son of Resh Lakish. His child died. On the first day, [Resh Lakish] did not go to [comfort] him. The next day, he took Judah bar Naḥmani, his disseminator [or, translator—Ed.], [with him to comfort R. Ḥiyya bar Abba. Resh Lakish] said to [his disseminator], “Stand and say a matter [of comfort] with regard to [the death of] the child.” He began and said, “And the Lord saw it and He abhorred them, due to the provocation of His sons and His daughters (Deuteronomy 32:19). A generation in which the fathers abhor the Holy One, He is angered at their sons and their daughters, and they die when they are small.”

And there are [those who] say [that the child who died] was [not a small child, but] a youth, and this is what [the disseminator] said to him: “Therefore the Lord shall have no joy in their young men, nor shall He have compassion on their orphans and widows, for everyone is a flatterer and an evildoer, and every mouth speaks obscenity. For all this His anger is not turned away, and His hand is still outstretched (Isaiah 9:16).” What [is the meaning of the phrase] And His hand is still outstretched? R. Ḥanan bar Rav said: Everyone knows why a bride enters the wedding canopy. [It is the step before consummation of the marriage.] However, [one should not speak about it unnecessarily, as] anyone who profanes his mouth and issues a matter of profanity from his mouth, even if a positive decree of seventy years was sealed for him, [nevertheless,] it is transformed for him into an evil [decree].

[The Gemara asks about this incident:] He came [at the behest of Resh Lakish] to comfort [R. Ḥiyya bar Abba] and [instead] he upset him [by attributing the death of his son to his transgressions. The Gemara answers: It was not his intention to upset R. Ḥiyya bar Abba and to attribute the death of his son to his actions. Rather,] this is what he is saying to him: You are [sufficiently] significant to be seized, [i.e., to die or suffer,] for the [sins of the] generation, [as it is specifically the righteous few who are punished for the transgressions of a sinful generation].

[Resh Lakish] said to his [disseminator], “Stand and say a statement with regard to the praiseworthiness of the Holy One.” He began and said, “God, Who is great in the abundance of His greatness, mighty and strong in the abundance of His awesome [deeds], Who revives the dead in [fulfillment of] His statement, Who does great deeds beyond comprehension, wondrous deeds without number. Blessed are You, Lord, Who revives the dead.”

[Resh Lakish] said to him, “Stand and say a statement with regard to the mourners.” He began and said, “Our brothers, who are exhausted, who are overwhelmed by this mourning, set your heart to examine this: This is what stands forever. It is a path from the six days of Creation, [i.e., death exists since Creation, and it is well known that this is the fate of man]. Many have drunk [from the poisonous cup of death], and many will drink. As [was the consequence of the] drink of the first [who have drunk], so too [will be the consequence of the] drink of the last [who will drink]. Our brothers, may the Master of solace comfort you. Blessed [are You, Lord], Who comforts the mourners.”

Abaye said [with regard to the statement concerning the mourners]: Let him say: Many have drunk; let him not say: Many will drink. Let him say: The drink of the first; let him not say: The drink of the last. [This is] as R. Simeon ben Lakish said, and likewise it was taught in the name of R. Yosi: A person should never open his mouth to Satan [and speculate about potential disasters]. R. Joseph said: What is the verse [from which it is derived]? We should have almost been as Sodom, we should have been like unto Gomorrah (Isaiah 1:9), [after which,] what did [the prophet] reply to them? Hear the word of the Lord, rulers of Sodom; [give ear unto the law of our God, people of Gomorrah (Isaiah 1:10). Isaiah drew the analogy and immediately it was realized.]

[Resh Lakish] said to [the disseminator], “Stand and say a statement with regard to those who comfort the mourners.” He began and said, “Our brothers, bestowers of loving-kindness, sons of bestowers of loving-kindness, who embrace the covenant of Abraham our Patriarch, as it is stated: For I know him, that he will command his children . . . [to do righteousness and justice] (Genesis 18:19). Our brothers, may the Master of reward pay you your just deserts. Blessed are You, [Lord,] Who pays the just deserts.”

[Resh Lakish] said to [the disseminator], “Stand and say a statement with regard to the entire Jewish people.” He began and said, “Master of the worlds, redeem and save, rescue and deliver Your people, Israel, from the pestilence and from the sword, and from spoil, and from the blight, and from the mildew, and from all types of afflictions that suddenly erupt and come to the world. Before we call and You will respond. Blessed are You, [Lord,] Who halts the plague.”